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Showing posts from April, 2017

God Doesn't Waste Pain

As I stood in the bathroom stall and wept quietly, I wondered if I would die from the pain that filled my chest.  The heaviness that engulfed me threatened to smother me, and I gasped for air as my mind raced. “Is this my life now?  Is this the way it will always be?  Will the pain ever end? “ On the outside, I appeared to be stable.  I was working at a demanding job, parenting three kids, volunteering in the community, and I was serving alongside my husband at the church he pastors.  However, inside, I was crumbling.  I was suffering from a hopelessness that was so crippling that it left me weeping, curled in the fetal position on my closet floor.  The pain coursed through my veins, filling every cell of my body with fear and regret.  My pain overpowered me at times, and I wondered if I could die from the weight and sadness of it all. My body didn’t know which state to be in – I was constantly transitioning from “fight or flight” – when my heart raced, my hands shook, and I wanted n…

Finding A Way To Feel

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April 7, 2017by Beth Mabe Gianopulos Category: Devotion
“Slowness to anger makes for deep understanding, a quick-tempered person stockpiles stupidity.” Proverbs 14:29 MSG Even as I said the words, I knew that I should not say them. I was angry, and I could feel myself losing control. As my emotions took over, I yelled more and said more hurtful things. As the anger began to subside, I saw the hurt faces around me and knew that I had made a terrible mistake. At that point, the crushing guilt and regret took over. Anger can be a good emotion. Anger compels us to seek justice and to change situations that are unfair. However, anger that is not righteous and that is uncontrolled can be devastating. Why is anger so hard to control? We live in a society that teaches us that some emotions are acceptable and others are not. From our childhood we are instructed, “Don’t cry.” “Stop getting so angry!” “You need to be positive.” “Why can’t you just be happy?” While it is not healthy to languish in …